Innocence
by Skylar93
Summary: She waits for him to live again while he sheds his innocence with every lie he tells.
1. Prologue

**Innocence**

Prologue**  
**

* * *

He was skilled.

He was at the epitome of his profession's art. As a child, he was taught, bred to follow its laws, and to live about its very meaning to its very end.

His father, having died when was no more than a year old, was an advocate of his art. His mother, however, greatly detested such practice not because it was against the law but because it was plainly corrupt and evil.

It did not, though by great efforts to oppose by his mother, interfere with his objectives; to become what his father had not been strong enough to be. Soon enough, just like all its former children, it had taken him under its wing, feeding him with lies, teaching him the ways, and slowly but surely, destroying his innocence.

It wasn't long before he lost the will to love. After a brief affair with the brown-eyed girl that had torn him to pieces. He felt nothing but hate towards everything in the world.

He loved her and at the same time, he didn't.

He felt nothing, no guilt, no compassion, not even love when she was with him. But when she left, his whole world came tumbling down.

Eventually, the feeling completely evaded his emotions.

When he saw her again, at the trial defending his client's victim, his eyes never ones glanced at her or showed any signs of affections. His bloodshot eyes were fixed solely on his file and his client.

He supposedly became heartless after that.

He became what his profession had trained him to. He was the unfeeling creature that will one day serve as its master.

There were times when he would think back to the possibilities he could have taken. But his assimilation to fight for this truthful injustice was beyond what he could ever look back from.

It wasn't until the day when lies were no longer a fear to him. It became his way of life.

He fought for the bad. He fought for the corrupt. He fought for the guilty. He fought for what he thought was right. His mindset was fixed on that reality.

And, because of this, he killed the innocent.

He took a deep breathe as he left the court room, proud of himself.

He was skilled. Yes, that was a fact.

But he was also dead inside.

_And from a far, she waits for him to start living again.  
_

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AN: School is practically over and I've been writing the whole story yesterday so you at least found it okay or something remotely close to liking it. This is just the prologue. I'm not writing the whole story in this writing style. I'll try to update as soon as I can I've already written the other chapters for my other stories but I think I'll wait until my wrist cast comes off which is six days so for now I'll just write this. Hope you found the story at least a bit interesting!

Skylar


	2. Chapter 1

**Innocence **

Chapter 1

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Natsume had a meeting earlier that day.

He talked to his client, a former mafia leader, who was obviously guilty of the charges acquitted, and discussed the matter of his case. It was practically a win for him.

The evidences used against him were almost useless if not for the fact that he had his prints for it. Natsume's clients alibi was as good as a lie can get, given his connections. The jury was practically at their mercy with the exception of three people, all of which, from their background info, were female rights activists. They were already winning and the trial wasn't even until next Wednesday, two days from now.

After the meeting and a few cigarette breaks later, he was given a bonus check enough to last him until next year. Working with criminals did have its perks.

He came home after that to his lonely two-bedroom apartment that allegedly gave him comfort and the feeling of security. He felt neither.

His apartment was tidy, clean and practically everything was untouched. Most of his furniture was bought to give the impression of sophistication and elegance to his clients that wanted to stop by once in a while. His kitchen was unused and he almost can't remember the last time he had seen it. His bedroom was the only place in his whole apartment that he felt he was living in. The rest were just ornaments to his work.

Natsume spent approximately nine hours in his apartment daily. He spent seven them sleeping and the rest preparing. Everyday was battle for him.

Natsume was always ready for it.

If life was only a fair game, Natsume would have won it without much effort on his part. But then again, life wasn't and so he had to prepare for every fight. He always won still.

It didn't take long before loneliness crept in and Natsume had the urge to leave his apartment. It was always like that for him. That's why he spent most of his time awake trying to get out of his apartment than living in its cumbersome walls.

The silence inside the room had always prompted him to think. He only had one thought in mind, the same one over and over again.

He thought about her. And only her.

Mikan Sakura was his former college roommate. They lived in the same apartment with Natsume's former best friend, Ruka Nogi. Though it may have seem then that Ruka and Mikan were the ones getting along, romantically, they never ended up together. She fell for Natsume as he did for her.

They were never officially a couple, it was never spoken of but they just knew and even Ruka knew.

Occasionally, they would hold hands and at times he would even kiss her. A smile threatened to appear on his lips whenever he remembered the time she would close her eyes to wait for him. Although most of the time he never did kiss her, it never stopped her from doing so. He fought the urge to smile and he never did. Natsume Hyuuga only smirked.

They went to law school together. They were friends in unusual ways and lovers in the most hackneyed ways. And despite his alleged indifference to their relationship, she stayed with him for five years.

She was breathtaking like that.

He still remembered everything about her just like it was yesterday. He loved the feeling but hated the memory.

Of course, after he got his first internship in law firm, he never really gave her any reason to stay.

He avoided her, lied to her and cheated her. In a span of three months, they were over.

Natsume was never ever able to recover. He just stayed in that moment and never moved on. He would never show it though.

She probably left him for someone else, someone better and someone who deserved her. He obviously didn't. Mikan was indescribable. She cannot be defined by simple words or a man such as himself. But he tried.

She was good and bad at the same time. She had her demons too. She smoked when she was incredibly sad but she never drank. She drove people away whenever she's hurt but she always manages to bring you back and never lets you go again. She treats everyone exactly the same that it's almost hard to tell if she's sincere or not but she is.

He still loved her but he'll never admit it to himself as he continuously crowds her in his thought with all the evil that surrounds him.

And when he did allow himself to think of her, he loses himself with regret and turns to his work for comfort. It didn't take long before it took everything out of him.

It got even worse when he heard a rumour from his old mentor that she was engaged to a doctor, a vet she was friends with.

The last time he saw her, when they were coincidentally working on opposing side on one case, he happened to see a sparkle in her ring finger that glistened against the bright white light in the court room, taunting him and his heart as she walked towards the stands to defend his client's victim. He fought hard and played cold. She lost the case and he gained the silence in his heart he had always hoped for.

He supposedly became heartless after that.

But whenever she did come to mind, Natsume would busy himself with work just to completely eradicate her existence from his thoughts. She bothered him that much.

It wasn't a secret why he wanted to block her out of his mind. He wanted her to be gone. As much he wanted to it to be true, despite what he wants to think, Natsume could never regret the feelings he shared with her.

Imagine his discomfort when he saw her sitting with man in the corner of the coffee shop he'd entered.

She saw him immediately and stared at him, waiting.

He looked away from her, completely avoiding her gaze. It was as if she never existed, he persisted in his thought.

'As if she never existed,' He thought, over and over again.

Mikan, from the corner of her eyes, watched him. She brought the rim of the mug to her lips and took one last sip of her coffee. She wanted to go to him but her body wouldn't allow her. She was immobilized by him and he didn't even do anything. Her heart felt heavy and she almost didn't know what to do.

Luckily for her, Natsume did it for her.

He left the minute she stood up from her seat.

_I've been waiting for you for so long now….._

_

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_

_Skylar  
_


	3. Chapter 2

**Innocence **

Chapter 2

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Natsume didn't know where to go. Neither did he know what to do.

She was there. He saw her. After everything they've been through, he shouldn't be feeling any of these – emotions. It was openly suggested after their last encounter that they weren't ever going to see each other again and that they were supposed to be enemies. They should be enemies after what he did to her career. He put her through so much humiliation. She was fired from her law firm for goodness sake's. How was he going to face her then? And more importantly why would she even bother with him?

"Ah, shit!" He yelled as he kicked the stained walls of the nearby alley. He walked father into the alley until he reached a dead end. Angrily, he punched the walls, leaving him with bloody knuckles and an aching fist. It wasn't enough for him. He punched the wall one more time, staining it as he did, before he was satisfied with the evident pain.

It wasn't enough though.

It didn't even overshadow the sharp pain in his chest, the strong emotions inside his chest. He couldn't understand it. His knuckles were bleeding but it wasn't enough for him. The painful memories of her were still in his head. It wouldn't go away. The last time they saw each other and what he – all those deceitful words he told her! And the way he manipulated her and the hateful look in her eyes. His heart still ached and nothing could compare.

"Ah!" He kicked the walls, simultaneously pushing himself to the ground, headfirst.

He didn't even try standing up. From the ground, somehow, it felt nice just to be there. The cold, rough cement that scraped his arm gave him some twisted feeling of happiness; of justice. He felt as if he deserved to be there, on the cold hard ground and to simply let death take its course.

He pushed the heavy brick that lay bloodied at the edge of his head. He felt as though fate had placed it there as a pillow to catch his fall but only it was to bring him to a long lasting sleep. As he limply reached above his head to feel the wet, sticky gush of blood near his head, he felt helpless. It felt good. Justice was finally given to those who deserved it. He couldn't very well argue with it. After all, he did convict almost twelve innocent people. He was convinced that it was only right. He didn't regret anything except maybe a few minor areas in his life he could've smooth over but other than the though of a few more minutes with her, he knew he was okay with it.

It all happened so fast. Less than an hour after seeing her and he was starting to lose his mind. Of all the people that he had to see today, it had to be her. A warm feeling was spreading through his heart. It wasn't quite unfamiliar to it but it wasn't all that recognizable to him either. It was bittersweet almost poetic in its ache. Despite his mad state, he couldn't help but admit that this was the perfect way to die.

He had thought about it once. Only once.

He believed that if death was his faith that his memories of her would be the best companion to his demise.

Then again he was lawyer, and he was just doing what he did best; lying.

He thought about it all the time.

"Natsume!"

When he heard that familiar voice, his mind began to wonder over death. Was it all true?

They say that, when facing death, your life seems to flash before your eyes and you start to think of all the important things in your life. In his case, he heard her. She was calling his name even. Her voice calling him was probably one of the most enchanting things he'd ever heard. Her soft silky voice, sweet and high-pitched, though it can be annoying, just the sound of it made his heart pound. Even more, whenever she called him, her words seemed like magic as if hearing her say his name was almost impossible. He couldn't very well explain it but he just knew.

"Natsume!"

He would smile if only death hadn't hurt as much.

For a while, he thought about the pain. His agony was by no means a fight but more of a silent war. He kept it in and didn't even let a whimper be heard. He felt the blood reach his leg. He couldn't really see anything and he suddenly hated death.

He did lie just then. He wanted to see her. Hear her. Feel her. He couldn't help but feel so stupid for having kept all his feelings in for so long. He had been silent for so long. For once, he just wanted to be honest. Just this once.

He screamed once.

His heat raced, pounding louder than before. He couldn't think straight and when he focused his attention in other matters, they would all somehow trace back to her. Briefly, he let his thoughts of her drift.

He was dying anyway, why not die a happy man?

"Natsume!"

His eyes played tricks on his, he believed.

When he opened his eyes, Mikan Sakura couldn't be this woman in front of him, could she?

"No."

_'And when the world treats you way too fairly, well it's a shame I'm a dream.'_

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_Wrote this a long time ago but I forgot where I saved it. But anyway this is pretty mushed together and a bit confusing. It is short but the following chapters will focus more on how they'll deal with each other which and with Natsume's past which is basically the story. To all the few who had bothered to review my story, this is dedicated to you all and thanks!  
_

_Skylar_


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